Pro 13:24 | KingComments | STEP | Not disciplining a child is not only a lack of parenting, but also a lack of love. The rod is one of the means of parenting, not the only means. Eli withheld his sons his rod and God had to judge them ( ). Slack parenting does a child no good, but harm. It is not true love, but goes against the best interests of the child. ‘His’ rod is the rod of the father for ‘his’ son. ‘Diligence’ indicates commitment by the father. He does not proceed laxly, but with deliberation and purpose. There is also zeal in it. Withholding the rod here is called hating the child. It is claimed that the use of the rod is not evidence of love for the child. But in fact, it is often self-love rather than love for the child. Parents do not discipline the child because they do not discipline themselves. They are guided by their natural feelings and indulgence, by the desire to be liked and wanting to be popular. But it is better to inflict short pain than to suffer a lifetime of pain caused by children to whom the rod has been withheld. Nor should there be an excess of discipline. A punishment must be consistent with the disobedience that deserves punishment. The child will otherwise become despondent or bitter, and that because of our actions ( ; ). Parenting is about the balance between giving the child space to grow and indicating the boundaries of that space. Corporal punishment is increasingly outlawed in modern Western society. The growth of child abuse cases has caused this shift in public opinion. Clearly, there is a difference between beating and abuse. It is at this point that public opinion wanders. As is always the case with public opinion, the pendulum has swung from one extreme to the other. However, the Bible does not speak of child abuse, but commands that a spanking should be given because it is an effective means of teaching a young child. An Egyptian proverb says: Children have their ears on their behinds; they listen when they are spanked. God wants us in childhood to learn to associate physical pain inflicted on us by our parents with evil, to train us to make the right moral choices as we grow up.

‏ Proverbs 13:24

He Who Loves His Son, Disciplines Him

Not disciplining a child is not only a lack of parenting, but also a lack of love. The rod is one of the means of parenting, not the only means. Eli withheld his sons his rod and God had to judge them (1Sam 2:27-34 ; 1Sam 3:11-14 ; 1Sam 4:11). Slack parenting does a child no good, but harm. It is not true love, but goes against the best interests of the child. ‘His’ rod is the rod of the father for ‘his’ son. ‘Diligence’ indicates commitment by the father. He does not proceed laxly, but with deliberation and purpose. There is also zeal in it.

Withholding the rod here is called hating the child. It is claimed that the use of the rod is not evidence of love for the child. But in fact, it is often self-love rather than love for the child. Parents do not discipline the child because they do not discipline themselves. They are guided by their natural feelings and indulgence, by the desire to be liked and wanting to be popular. But it is better to inflict short pain than to suffer a lifetime of pain caused by children to whom the rod has been withheld.

Nor should there be an excess of discipline. A punishment must be consistent with the disobedience that deserves punishment. The child will otherwise become despondent or bitter, and that because of our actions (Eph 6:4; Col 3:21). Parenting is about the balance between giving the child space to grow and indicating the boundaries of that space.

Corporal punishment is increasingly outlawed in modern Western society. The growth of child abuse cases has caused this shift in public opinion. Clearly, there is a difference between beating and abuse. It is at this point that public opinion wanders. As is always the case with public opinion, the pendulum has swung from one extreme to the other.

However, the Bible does not speak of child abuse, but commands that a spanking should be given because it is an effective means of teaching a young child. An Egyptian proverb says: Children have their ears on their behinds; they listen when they are spanked. God wants us in childhood to learn to associate physical pain inflicted on us by our parents with evil, to train us to make the right moral choices as we grow up.