Eph 5:22-24 | KingComments | STEP | . is a connecting verse. On the one hand, this verse closes the previous section with the call to subject to one another. That regards the general relations in the church. To be subjected to one another is a wonderful feature of the new man. On the other hand, this verse is also introductory to the section that follows. From until chapter 6:9 you will have to deal with different earthly relations, wherein subjection plays an important role. You can see it as a practical effect of . Discussed are the relationships between:: 1. wife and husband in marriage ( ), 2. children and parents in the family ( ) and 3. slaves and masters in society ( ). It is remarkable that in each relation the first party that is being addressed, is the party that is placed by God in subjection to the other. That is an expression of God’s special interest for the ones who are placed by Him in this position. They especially get the chance to show the features of the Lord Jesus in their position of being subjected. Wasn’t He the perfect subjected One in His life on earth? You will also notice that everyone is being addressed in the area in which he or she is weak. Being subjected is not ‘trendy’. In the world around us the woman is being told that she is equal to the man. She has to prove herself, develop her opportunities and defend her rights. Thereby the fact is ignored that she can only be happy and can develop at her best, when she is willing to be ‘wife’ for her husband. For Christian women it is not easy to be free from the influence of this thinking. It is only possible when she always has the blueprint of God’s Word set out clearly in her mind. She can thereby think that she may be subjected to her husband “as to the Lord”. Behind her husband she may see the Lord. A woman will not only be subjected to her husband if he fulfills her desires or if she sees in him a man whom she can come up with. She will be subject to him because he is her husband. This exhortation of Paul to women is being made of no effect and even being explained away, also within professing Christianity. For that reason it is important to remind you that God’s Word has not lost its effect or meaning regarding this. The woman, who in spite of all resistance obeys this, will experience the blessing of it. . As so often, God also gives an explanation for this. He has instituted it that way because of the picture that is shown of Christ and the church in the relation between the husband and his wife. You understand now also why satan does everything to turn this institution of God in marriage upside down. Satan hates everything that is a reminder of God and Christ. Everywhere where the husband functions as the head of his wife and the wife is subjected to him we see a living testimony of the relationship between Christ and the church. It is the privilege of the Christian to give shape to this in his marriage. That the man is head means that he has a leading position and that it happens in love. God gives that position to Christ toward the church. To this position something more is added and that is that Christ is “the Savior of the body”. On the Head, Christ, depend salvation, protection and nourishment of the body, the church. It is against God’s purpose if a wife, in order to prove her independence in society, earns her own salary and takes care of herself, apart from her ‘caregiver’. This is not about a believing woman who has to work due to poverty. She deserves our respect. The point is: it is often about the desire for luxury and for her making her own decisions, and that is a wrong motive. Own money and own time lead to an own life. The unity, as it is presented by marriage also, is totally lacking in those cases or has even totally disappeared. . Women are a picture of the church. The church is subject to Christ. Because Christ is perfect in His relation to His wife, the church, it should not be that difficult for the church to be subject to Him. But husbands, who are a picture of Christ, are not perfect. Therefore it is not easy for wives to be truly subjected. Yet the practice of husbands is not the standard for subjection. The standard is: the church in relation to Christ, as it is seen by God. It can then be said that wives are subjected to their husbands “in everything”. There is no room for ‘yes, but’. Subjection is an attitude, a state of mind. Even if the husbands make it difficult for their wives, or almost unbearable, then this remains: “so also the wives [ought to be] to their husbands in everything”. That doesn’t mean that they should consent to be forced to do things that are against the Scripture. In that case they should say ‘no’. But even in saying ‘no’ they should not give up the attitude of subjection. . After he has addressed the wives in three verses, Paul now addresses the husbands in the following nine verses. The standard for their relation to their wives and their love for them is Christ and His love for the church. The husbands do not come off easier than the wives. On the contrary, their example is much higher. The love of the Lord Jesus and of God is a giving love. In order to get the right impression of such love, we are absolutely dependent on the Scripture and the Spirit. Otherwise we could mix or confuse the Divine love easily with our emotions and thoughts of love. You can see the love of the Lord Jesus for His church in the example of the merchant seeking fine pearls ( ). That merchant sells all because of the value of that one pearl. We also find that in the Lord Jesus. He sold all that He had. Yet that does not reflect the whole value of the love of the Lord Jesus for His church. Even in the surrender of His life, which goes beyond what He possessed, one cannot yet fully see that perfect love that is at issue here. It goes even further. Here it is said that He gave “Himself” for the church. He went into death and through death. He arose and ascended to heaven. He did that all in His full dedication to His bride. That is the way it is presented here and that is the example that is set out for the husbands. Then the husband is lovingly devoted in every part of his life to his wife with whom he is connected. It is not about the love of Christ for sinners here. In sinners there was nothing attractive for Him, while here His love is exactly encouraged by the attractiveness of the church. From eternity He has loved the church as He looked upon her according to the purposes of God. He still looks upon her that way. Therefore He did not only give Himself on the cross, but He still gives Himself, also now in heaven. He is committed to her with a ceaseless dedication. His dedication started when He came to earth and it continued when He went to the cross. And it still goes on, till the moment comes when He will present us to Himself in heaven. His love is this: He makes everything He is, available to us, His church. In this way the love of the husband for his wife should not be limited to the time when he has the chance for it. It should be shown, as the Lord Jesus did, always . That is the standard. Now read Ephesians 5:22-25 again. Reflection: What is expected from husbands as well as wives in their marriage

‏ Ephesians 5:22-24

Wives and Husbands

Eph 5:22. Eph 5:21 is a connecting verse. On the one hand, this verse closes the previous section with the call to subject to one another. That regards the general relations in the church. To be subjected to one another is a wonderful feature of the new man. On the other hand, this verse is also introductory to the section that follows. From Eph 5:22 until chapter 6:9 you will have to deal with different earthly relations, wherein subjection plays an important role. You can see it as a practical effect of Eph 5:21.

Discussed are the relationships between::

1. wife and husband in marriage (Eph 5:22-33),

2. children and parents in the family (Eph 6:1-4) and

3. slaves and masters in society (Eph 6:5-9).

It is remarkable that in each relation the first party that is being addressed, is the party that is placed by God in subjection to the other. That is an expression of God’s special interest for the ones who are placed by Him in this position. They especially get the chance to show the features of the Lord Jesus in their position of being subjected. Wasn’t He the perfect subjected One in His life on earth? You will also notice that everyone is being addressed in the area in which he or she is weak.

Being subjected is not ‘trendy’. In the world around us the woman is being told that she is equal to the man. She has to prove herself, develop her opportunities and defend her rights. Thereby the fact is ignored that she can only be happy and can develop at her best, when she is willing to be ‘wife’ for her husband.

For Christian women it is not easy to be free from the influence of this thinking. It is only possible when she always has the blueprint of God’s Word set out clearly in her mind. She can thereby think that she may be subjected to her husband “as to the Lord”. Behind her husband she may see the Lord. A woman will not only be subjected to her husband if he fulfills her desires or if she sees in him a man whom she can come up with. She will be subject to him because he is her husband.

This exhortation of Paul to women is being made of no effect and even being explained away, also within professing Christianity. For that reason it is important to remind you that God’s Word has not lost its effect or meaning regarding this. The woman, who in spite of all resistance obeys this, will experience the blessing of it.

Eph 5:23. As so often, God also gives an explanation for this. He has instituted it that way because of the picture that is shown of Christ and the church in the relation between the husband and his wife. You understand now also why satan does everything to turn this institution of God in marriage upside down. Satan hates everything that is a reminder of God and Christ.

Everywhere where the husband functions as the head of his wife and the wife is subjected to him we see a living testimony of the relationship between Christ and the church. It is the privilege of the Christian to give shape to this in his marriage. That the man is head means that he has a leading position and that it happens in love. God gives that position to Christ toward the church.

To this position something more is added and that is that Christ is “the Savior of the body”. On the Head, Christ, depend salvation, protection and nourishment of the body, the church. It is against God’s purpose if a wife, in order to prove her independence in society, earns her own salary and takes care of herself, apart from her ‘caregiver’.

This is not about a believing woman who has to work due to poverty. She deserves our respect. The point is: it is often about the desire for luxury and for her making her own decisions, and that is a wrong motive. Own money and own time lead to an own life. The unity, as it is presented by marriage also, is totally lacking in those cases or has even totally disappeared.

Eph 5:24. Women are a picture of the church. The church is subject to Christ. Because Christ is perfect in His relation to His wife, the church, it should not be that difficult for the church to be subject to Him. But husbands, who are a picture of Christ, are not perfect. Therefore it is not easy for wives to be truly subjected. Yet the practice of husbands is not the standard for subjection. The standard is: the church in relation to Christ, as it is seen by God. It can then be said that wives are subjected to their husbands “in everything”. There is no room for ‘yes, but’.

Subjection is an attitude, a state of mind. Even if the husbands make it difficult for their wives, or almost unbearable, then this remains: “so also the wives [ought to be] to their husbands in everything”. That doesn’t mean that they should consent to be forced to do things that are against the Scripture. In that case they should say ‘no’. But even in saying ‘no’ they should not give up the attitude of subjection.

Eph 5:25. After he has addressed the wives in three verses, Paul now addresses the husbands in the following nine verses. The standard for their relation to their wives and their love for them is Christ and His love for the church. The husbands do not come off easier than the wives. On the contrary, their example is much higher. The love of the Lord Jesus and of God is a giving love. In order to get the right impression of such love, we are absolutely dependent on the Scripture and the Spirit. Otherwise we could mix or confuse the Divine love easily with our emotions and thoughts of love.

You can see the love of the Lord Jesus for His church in the example of the merchant seeking fine pearls (Mt 13:45-46). That merchant sells all because of the value of that one pearl. We also find that in the Lord Jesus. He sold all that He had. Yet that does not reflect the whole value of the love of the Lord Jesus for His church. Even in the surrender of His life, which goes beyond what He possessed, one cannot yet fully see that perfect love that is at issue here. It goes even further. Here it is said that He gave “Himself” for the church. He went into death and through death. He arose and ascended to heaven.

He did that all in His full dedication to His bride. That is the way it is presented here and that is the example that is set out for the husbands. Then the husband is lovingly devoted in every part of his life to his wife with whom he is connected.

It is not about the love of Christ for sinners here. In sinners there was nothing attractive for Him, while here His love is exactly encouraged by the attractiveness of the church. From eternity He has loved the church as He looked upon her according to the purposes of God. He still looks upon her that way. Therefore He did not only give Himself on the cross, but He still gives Himself, also now in heaven. He is committed to her with a ceaseless dedication.

His dedication started when He came to earth and it continued when He went to the cross. And it still goes on, till the moment comes when He will present us to Himself in heaven. His love is this: He makes everything He is, available to us, His church. In this way the love of the husband for his wife should not be limited to the time when he has the chance for it. It should be shown, as the Lord Jesus did, always. That is the standard.

Now read Ephesians 5:22-25 again.

Reflection: What is expected from husbands as well as wives in their marriage – and why?