‏ 2 Samuel 13

Amnon and Tamar: Sin and Its Consequences in David’s Family

This section tells the sad story of David’s children—Amnon, Tamar, and Absalom. It shows how sin can cause pain and trouble in families, especially when leaders do not act to stop evil. The story warns us about the dangers of uncontrolled desires and the importance of justice and care for others.

v. 1: Amnon, David’s oldest son, fell in love with his half-sister Tamar, who was very beautiful. Amnon’s feelings were strong, but they were not right .

v. 2: Amnon became so obsessed with Tamar that he made himself sick. He wanted her, but because she was a virgin and their father would not let them be together, he felt there was nothing he could do.

v. 3: Amnon had a friend named Jonadab, who was very clever and crafty. Jonadab noticed that Amnon was depressed and asked him what was wrong.

v. 4: Jonadab asked Amnon why he, the king’s son, looked so thin every morning. Amnon told Jonadab he loved Tamar, his brother Absalom’s sister.

v. 5: Jonadab gave Amnon a wicked plan. He told Amnon to pretend to be sick and ask for Tamar to come and give him food and care for him, so he could be alone with her.

v. 6: Amnon followed Jonadab’s advice and pretended to be sick. When King David visited him, Amnon asked his father to let Tamar come and prepare food for him to eat.

v. 7: David sent for Tamar and told her to go to Amnon’s house and prepare food for her sick brother.

v. 8: Tamar went to Amnon’s house and made food while he watched. She took the dough, kneaded it, and baked cakes.

v. 9: She took the pan and served the food to Amnon, but he refused to eat. He told everyone in the room to leave, so he could be alone with Tamar.

v. 10: Amnon asked Tamar to bring the food into his bedroom, and when she did, he grabbed her.

v. 11: Amnon told Tamar to lie with him, but she resisted and begged him not to do this wicked thing.

v. 12: Tamar reminded Amnon that such a thing should not be done in Israel. She asked him not to shame her and not to be so foolish.

v. 13: Tamar said if he did this, she would be disgraced, and he would be like one of the wicked men in Israel. She told him to ask the king, because maybe he would allow them to marry.

v. 14: But Amnon refused to listen to her. He was stronger than she was and forced her, committing a terrible sin.

v. 15: Afterward, Amnon hated Tamar with a very great hatred, even more than he had loved her before. He told her to get up and leave.

v. 16: Tamar protested, saying this was even worse than what he had already done, but Amnon would not listen.

v. 17: Amnon called his servant and told him to put Tamar out and lock the door after her.

v. 18: Tamar was wearing a special robe, showing she was a royal virgin. The servant threw her out and locked the door.

v. 19: Tamar put ashes on her head, tore her robe, and went away crying loudly, showing her great sorrow and shame.

v. 20: Her brother Absalom saw her and told her to be quiet and not take the matter to heart, but Tamar remained desolate in Absalom’s house.

The Plot Against Amnon.

This section shows how one sin leads to another, just like water pouring out after a dam breaks. David’s family faces more and more trouble because of past mistakes. The story teaches that when sin is not dealt with properly, it can grow into something much worse.

v. 21: When King David heard about what Amnon had done, he was very angry (he was very wroth,. He had every reason to be upset—Amnon’s actions brought shame on the whole family. It was also a bad example for the nation. However, David did not punish Amnon. Some sources suggest that David refrained from disciplining Amnon because he loved him as his firstborn son and heir to the throne. This was similar to Eli, who failed to correct his sons when they sinned (he frowned not on them, 1 Samuel 3:13 ^a). David’s own guilt over his past sins may have made it difficult for him to judge Amnon. Because Amnon was not punished, he became even more stubborn in his sin (Because sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily, therefore the heart of the sons of men is fully set in them to do evil, Ecclesiastes 8:11 ^b). According to the law, Amnon’s crime deserved severe punishment, possibly even death, as outlined in Leviticus 20:17 ^c.

v. 22: Absalom hated Amnon for hurting his sister Tamar (Absalom hated Amnon,. He said nothing to Amnon, either good or bad, but his silence hid his deep anger and desire for revenge. The Bible warns that he that hateth his brother is a murderer (1 John 3:15 ^d). Absalom’s anger was not just about justice but about personal vengeance. Instead of seeking proper justice, he secretly planned to kill Amnon. This shows how one sin can lead to another, as Absalom tried to fix Amnon’s sin by committing another sin himself. God’s law commands, Do not commit adultery and Do not kill (James 2:11 ^e), but Absalom ignored these commands in his pursuit of revenge.

v. 23: Absalom did not show his anger. He stopped talking to Amnon about the matter, good or bad. He acted as if nothing was wrong. This hidden hatred grew worse. If Absalom had talked to Amnon, maybe Amnon would have been sorry. The Bible warns, You shall not hate your brother in your heart; you shall surely rebuke your neighbor (Leviticus 19:17 ^f). Absalom’s silence allowed his anger to grow for two whole years . The Bible says, Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger (Ephesians 4:26 ^g).

v. 24-25: After two years, Absalom invited King David and all his brothers to a party during sheep-shearing time (2 Samuel 13:24-25 ^h). Absalom wanted to look important and make people respect him. David did not come, saying he did not want to put pressure on Absalom to host such a big event. David wanted Absalom to be responsible with his possessions. Parents can learn from this to help their children be wise with what they have, but not to spoil them.

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v. 26-27: Absalom asked David if Amnon and the rest of his brothers could come to the party (2 Samuel 13:26-27 ⁱ). David agreed, not knowing Absalom’s plan. David’s sons still respected him enough to ask for permission, even as adults. Children should honor their parents and not make big decisions without them.

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v. 28-29: At the feast, Absalom gave orders to his servants to kill Amnon when he was drunk and not expecting danger (2 Samuel 13:28-29 ^j). This was very cruel. Absalom did not fight Amnon himself but had others do it for him. He broke God’s command, You shall not kill, and told his servants to obey him instead of God. The Bible says, We ought to obey God rather than men (Acts 5:29 ^k). All the king’s sons saw this murder and ran away in fear, not knowing if Absalom would hurt them, too. Now, the trouble that Nathan warned David about began to happen in David’s own family. Sin brought pain and fear into David’s house.

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Amnon's Death; Absalom's Flight.

This section tells what happened after Amnon was killed. First, there was confusion and fear in David’s house because of a false report. Then, the real news came, and David’s family went into mourning. Absalom ran away to escape justice, while David struggled with grief for his dead son and longing for his son in exile. This story shows how one sin can bring trouble to many people and how difficult it can be to respond rightly to family problems.

v. 30-31: David received a report that Absalom had killed all the king’s sons (2 Samuel 13:30 ^l). This was not true, but rumors often make things seem worse than they are. David was so upset that he tore his clothes and lay on the ground, thinking all his sons were dead (2 Samuel 13:31 ^m). We should remember not to panic when we hear bad news that is not confirmed, and to hope for the best even when things look bad.

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v. 32-33: Jonadab, David’s nephew, told David that only Amnon was dead, not all the sons. He also said that Absalom had planned this from the day Amnon hurt Tamar (2 Samuel 13:32-33 ⁿ). Jonadab may have known about the plan but did nothing to stop it. The Bible warns, If you say, “Surely we did not know this,” does not He who weighs the hearts consider it? (Proverbs 24:12 ^o). If we do not try to prevent evil when we can, we share in the blame.

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v. 34, 37-38: Absalom ran away after the murder (2 Samuel 13:34, 37-38 ^p). He was afraid of being punished, so he went to his grandfather, Talmai, the king of Geshur. Absalom stayed there for three years. Cities of refuge did not protect someone who killed on purpose, so he could not hide in Israel. Even though David did not punish Amnon, Absalom could not expect forgiveness for murder because God’s law was clear.

v. 34-35: Soon, the king’s sons arrived home, proving the rumor was false. Only Amnon was dead, and the others were safe (2 Samuel 13:34-35 ^q). This gave David relief that his other sons were alive, but he was still deeply sad because of Amnon’s murder by his own brother. The whole court and kingdom mourned because of the terrible sin and tragedy in the royal family.

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v. 37-39: David mourned for Amnon for a long time (2 Samuel 13:37 ^r). When his grief faded, he started to miss Absalom and wanted to see him again (2 Samuel 13:39 ^s). David was torn between doing justice and showing mercy. At first, he could not punish Absalom, but later he almost wanted to forgive him. This shows David’s human weakness and how hard it is to balance love for family with the need to do what is right. God saw the difference in David’s heart, but the situation was still very painful and complicated for everyone involved.