‏ 2 Samuel 3

David's Wives and Children

This section describes the long struggle between David’s house and Saul’s house before David became king over all Israel. During this time, David’s family grew, and each new son made his position stronger. The passage also reflects on the spiritual lesson that, just as David’s house grew stronger and Saul’s weaker, good (grace) in a believer should become stronger while evil (corruption) becomes weaker.

v. 1: There was a long war between the house of Saul and the house of David . Even though Saul was dead and his family was weaker, they did not give up easily. It is surprising that the war lasted so long, since David’s side was right and had God’s help. But God allowed this, to test David’s faith and patience. Over time, Saul’s supporters became fewer and weaker, while David’s side became stronger. Many people left Saul’s house and joined David. This struggle is like the fight between good and evil in our hearts. As we grow in faith, evil becomes weaker, and good becomes stronger, until good wins in the end.

v. 2–5: The passage lists six sons born to David by six different wives during his seven years in Hebron. Each son made David’s position more secure. The Bible says, He that has his quiver filled with these arrows shall speak with his enemy in the gate (Psalm 127:5 ^a). As Saul’s family became weaker because his sons died, David’s family grew stronger because more children were born. However, it was wrong for David to have so many wives, because the law said kings should not multiply wives (Deuteronomy 17:17 ^b). Also, David did not have more than one son with each wife during this time. Sadly, none of these sons became truly great, and three—Amnon, Absalom, and Adonijah—became well-known for their sins. David’s son by Abigail is called Chileab here (2 Samuel 3:3 ^c), but Daniel in another place (1 Chronicles 3:1 ^d). Some say he was first called Daniel, meaning God has judged me, but later was called Chileab because he looked so much like David. Absalom’s mother was the daughter of Talmai, king of Geshur, a non-Israelite prince. This marriage was probably meant to make David stronger politically, but Absalom later caused David much trouble and sadness. The last wife mentioned is called David’s wife; some believe this was Michal, David’s first wife, who may have had a child before she stopped having children.

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v. 6: David’s house became stronger, but Abner, the commander, made himself powerful for the house of Saul . If Abner left, Saul’s house would quickly fall apart.

Abner Deserts to David

This section describes how Abner, the commander of Saul’s army, changed his loyalty from Ish-bosheth, Saul’s son, to David. The story begins with a conflict between Abner and Ish-bosheth, leads to negotiations with David, and ends with Abner convincing others to support David as king. Through these events, we see that God can use the actions and even the mistakes of people to fulfill His plans.

v. 7: Ish-bosheth accused Abner of sleeping with one of Saul’s concubines . We do not know if this was true. However, it was unwise for Ish-bosheth to accuse Abner, since Abner was his strongest supporter. If the accusation was false, it was very unfair to suspect someone who had risked so much for him.

v. 8: Abner became very angry at Ish-bosheth’s accusation . He did not admit or deny the crime. Abner felt insulted and reminded Ish-bosheth of all the help he had given to Saul’s family, even fighting against Judah. He seemed to say that his loyalty deserved better treatment, but perhaps he was also serving his own ambitions.

v. 9–10: Abner told Ish-bosheth that he would now help David become king, just as God had promised (2 Samuel 3:9; 2 Samuel 3:10 ^e). Abner had supported Ish-bosheth out of ambition, but now he switched sides out of anger. He claimed to care about God’s will, but really he was thinking about himself. Even when people act from selfish reasons, God can use their choices to carry out His plans.

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v. 11: Ish-bosheth was so shocked by Abner’s response that he could not reply . He was weak and did not stand up for himself. As the Bible says, some enemies are like a bowing wall and a tottering fence (Psalm 62:3 ^f).

v. 12: Abner sent messengers to David, offering to help him gain control of all Israel . Abner admitted that David had the best right to rule and that the people preferred him. Sometimes, even those who once opposed God’s people end up helping them.

v. 13: David agreed to make a treaty with Abner, but only if Abner brought Michal, David’s first wife, back to him . This showed David’s love for Michal and his respect for Saul’s family. David wanted her to share in his new honor as king.

v. 14: David also sent a message to Ish-bosheth, demanding that Michal be returned to him, reminding him that he had paid a high price for her .

v. 15: Ish-bosheth had no power to refuse, so he took Michal from her current husband, Phaltiel, and gave her back to David .

v. 16: Michal’s second husband was very sad and followed her, weeping, but he had to let her go. He had to accept that she rightfully belonged to David . This reminds us not to hold tightly to things that are not truly ours.

v. 17: Abner spoke to the elders of Israel, telling them that they had once wanted David as king because of his victories and good service . He encouraged them to choose the better leader, who clearly deserved the throne.

v. 18: Abner also reminded them that God had chosen David, saying, The Lord hath spoken of David . God had promised that David would save Israel. Abner told them it was both their duty and in their best interest to accept David as king.

v. 19: Abner spoke privately to the tribe of Benjamin, his own tribe, since he had persuaded them before to support Saul’s family. Now he tried to convince them to support David .

v. 20: Abner came to David with twenty men. David welcomed them and gave them a feast, showing peace and friendship between them . This was a sign that their agreement was real and joyful, like making peace over a meal, as in If thy enemy hunger, feed him (Genesis 26:30 ^g).

v. 21: Abner promised David that he would bring all Israel under his rule . Even though Abner talked as if David’s new power was only because of his own help, we know it was really God’s plan. David and Abner parted as friends, and their agreement helped bring peace and unity to Israel. This teaches us to seek peace with others, even if they have not always acted well, and to trust God’s purposes.

Joab Murders Abner

This section explains the conflict between Joab and Abner, two powerful military leaders under King David. Abner had just left David in peace, but Joab did not trust him and wanted revenge for the death of his brother Asahel. The story shows the dangers of personal revenge and how it can disturb attempts at peace and unity in a nation.

v. 22: Just then, David’s servants and Joab returned from a raid, bringing much spoil with them. Abner was no longer with David because David had sent him away in peace .

v. 23: When Joab and his army arrived, they were told that Abner had come to the king and that David had let him go in safety.

v. 24: Joab went to the king and complained, asking why David had let Abner leave. He accused Abner of coming only to deceive and spy on David.

v. 25: Joab continued, warning David that Abner’s real purpose was to find out everything David was doing. Joab did not believe Abner’s intentions were good.

v. 26: Without telling David, Joab sent messengers to secretly bring Abner back from the well of Sirah. David did not know about this plan.

v. 27: When Abner returned to Hebron, Joab took him aside as if to speak with him privately and then stabbed him in the stomach, killing him. Joab did this to take revenge for the death of his brother Asahel .

v. 28: David heard about Abner’s murder and said he and his kingdom were innocent before the Lord forever for this bloodshed.

v. 29: David pronounced a curse on Joab’s family, saying that trouble and disease would always remain in their house. David showed he did not approve of Joab’s actions.

v. 30: Joab and his brother Abishai killed Abner because he had killed their brother Asahel in battle at Gibeon.

v. 31: David told Joab and all the people with him to tear their clothes, put on sackcloth, and mourn for Abner. David himself followed the coffin, showing public grief.

v. 32: Abner was buried in Hebron. David wept aloud at the grave, and all the people wept with him.

v. 33: The king sang a funeral song for Abner, saying, “Should Abner have died as a fool dies?” This showed David’s respect for Abner and his sorrow.

v. 34: David pointed out that Abner’s hands and feet were not tied, but he died by the wickedness of others. The people wept again for Abner.

v. 35: The people tried to persuade David to eat food while it was still day, but he refused and took an oath not to eat before sunset, showing his deep sadness.

v. 36: The people noticed David’s actions and were pleased. In everything, David behaved as a good leader, and the people respected him.

v. 37: That day, everyone understood that neither the king nor his kingdom was guilty of Abner’s murder.

v. 38: David told his servants that a great leader had fallen in Israel, and he confessed that, though he was king, he felt weak compared to the sons of Zeruiah (Joab and Abishai).

v. 39: David said that he was not yet strong enough to punish Joab and Abishai for their crime, but he trusted that the Lord would repay the evil men for their wicked deeds.